One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
