By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
