I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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