So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize
