I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
