I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
she pinky promised me she was 18
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
