there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
