She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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