His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
