fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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