I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
