Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
