This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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