life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
