I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
