Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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