"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize