I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
you made out with another girl for some wings
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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