There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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