when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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