found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Never underestimate the power of titties
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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