I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
