saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
