In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I just gargled with NyQuil
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
