My nipple is on Facebook.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
