she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
My ass is underappreciated
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
