I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Randomize
