Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
