don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
