I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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