my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
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