Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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