i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
do herpes really smell.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
