My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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