We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize