So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
They have beer where we have blood.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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