"it" just moved
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
