Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize