Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
