She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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