I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
it glows. i had to have it.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Randomize
