id be glad to
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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