You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
