what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Randomize
