I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
