Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I have fence marks all over my body
I have already put on my inside pants.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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