This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We're too hungover to prance.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize