My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
