you would pick up someone in the library
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
