I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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