We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
